Happiness:
Posted by Amy Hale on December 26, 2011 at 7:13 am
Who wants to be happy? Most of us, of course. However, chasing happiness will always leave you chasing happiness. When people pursue success, aren’t they really pursuing happiness?
Think about this…
When you’re unhappy, you want to be happy. When you are, you want what you want and go get it.
This weeks experiment/exercise:
Imagine that you are happy already (because you choose to be). What do you still want? Your answer might be surprising. Write/type at least a page on what you would do if you were already happy and you’ll know your next steps.
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Posted by Amy Hale on December 19, 2011 at 7:15 am
Do you push and push, day after day, not taking a break? Not even for a moment? I’m not talking about all of the work that you do. I’m talking about the self-bullying you do to yourself. Do you ever get tired of telling yourself that you “should” have done something different, or “If I hadn’t said that?”
You can take a vacation from your inner bully. Imagine what it might be like to not have that negative voice going on and on in your head. Think about how peaceful you could be. Think about all the things you could get done or even explore, if you’re inner bully wasn’t telling you no in some way.
You can write that summary. You can ride that bike, even if you haven’t rode in 20 years. Yeah, maybe your boss is a jerk- you don’t have to let that negative energy wrap you up for the rest of the day. (Yes, that’s negative self-talk, too.) What happens when you give permission for that negative voice to subside for just one day?
This week’s experiment:
Pick a day, not too far in the future – like today, for instance. Tell the negative inner voice that you’re leaving it for a vacation. This vacation can be for as long as you want, but it cannot be less than one day. Make a commitment to yourself to not be hard on yourself for at least one day.
Let me know how you do. What kinds of adventures did you allow your mind to take without that negative bully around?
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Posted by Amy Hale on November 28, 2011 at 7:10 am
Written by Steve Chandler
Professional people fall into two categories. There are doers and there are feelers.
Doers do what needs to be done to reach a goal that they themselves have set. They come to work having planned out what needs to be done.
Feelers, on the other hand, do what they feel like doing. Feelers take their emotional temperature throughout the day, checking in on themselves, figuring out what they feel like doing right now. Their lives, their outcomes, their financial security are all dictated by the fluctuation of their feelings. Their feelings will change constantly, of course, so it’s hard for a Feeler to follow anything through to a successful conclusion. Feelings are changed by many things……..biorhythms, gastric upset, too strong a cup of coffee, an annoying call from home, a rude waitress at lunch, a cold, a bit of constipation. Those are the dictating forces, the commanders, of a Feeler’s life.
A Doer already knows in advance how much time will be spent on the phone, how much in the field, what clients will be cultivated today, what relationships will be strengthened, what communications need to be made. A Doer uses a three-step system to guaranteed success: 1) They figure out what they want to achieve. 2) They figure out what needs to be done to achieve it. And, 3) They just do it. This is not a theory, this is the actual measured and observed system used by all super achievers without fail.
Whether you are a Doer or a Feeler has nothing to do with your character or personality. It has everything to do with choice. Choice is the key to it. You can choose either one, at any time, in any situation. So today, as you are challenged by situations, be sure to ask yourself, “What can I do about this?” instead of “How do I feel about this?” You’ll be very pleased with the day you have.
Nice job Steve Chandler. I highly recommend Steve’s work and he has written several books that you can find on Amazon.com. Just type in his name and there’s a nice list of them. He also has built a wonderful club called Club Fearless which can be found at http://www.clubfearless.net
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Posted by Amy Hale on April 19, 2010 at 6:00 am
“Infatuation is when you think he’s as sexy as Robert Redford, as smart as Henry Kissinger, as noble as Ralph Nader, and as athletic as Jimmy Connors. Love is when you realise that he’s as sexy as Woody Allen, as funny as Ralph Nader, as athletic as Henry Kissinger, and nothing like Robert Redford – but you’ll take him anyway.”
-Judith Viorst
People are continually being told to “do what they love and love what they do” in order to be successful. However, even with the multitude of books and audios on the market, many people still find themselves wondering what they love to do and inevitable wind up as desperate and unhappy in pursuit of doing what they love as much so as they are in the pursuit of who they love!
Are you in love with your visions of prosperity and abundance, or is it just infatuation? Here’s the simple test -
If it hurts, it isn’t love.
This Week’s Experiment:
(Based on Dr. John F. DeMartini’s book, Count Your Blessings: The Healing Power of Gratitude and Love)
Write down your vision of prosperity and abundance.
Imagine that vision is now a reality. List ten reasons or ways your abundant life is wonderful.
Now list ten problems or challenges that will still be in your life even when your vision is your reality.
Review the ten reasons or ways that your new life will be wonderful. Circle the one you believe you lack most now.
List at least three times when you have already experienced aspect you think you lack.
Finally, review the ten aspects of your vision you don’t yet like. Circle one aspect you think you could either accept or change.
May you fall in love with your life!
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Posted by Amy Hale on April 12, 2010 at 5:58 am
Recently I took on a new client who is clearly a genius. Unfortunately, he refused to take an IQ test just in case he turned out not to be an “official” genius.
For years, I refused to read any books about relationships or do any exercises on building awareness because I feared that deep down, my relationship might be doomed. (For the record, 6 years and still going strong at this time of writing!)
In both cases the fear is clouding our perceptions. The reality is that until we are honest with ourselves, we are living a lie!
This Week’s Experiment:
Get a notebook to write in. (Don’t use your journal, if you have one. You’re going to destroy the pages)
Now, write for at least 5 minutes what you really think about the following topics:
a. Your partner
b. Money
c. Sex
d. The Government
e. The opposite sex
Be sure to write the stuff you would never say because it’s too rude, naughty, freaky, or just plain terrifying!
Decide whether you are going to burn, shred, or keep your work!
Please share your comments below.
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Posted by Amy Hale on March 31, 2010 at 5:48 am
The brilliant psychiatrist David Viscott writes about the concept of taking risks to achieve success. When we step out of our comfort zone, we take a risk and extraordinary successful people do this every day. They risk loss of face, loss of ego, risk embarrassment in the name of creating and connecting and truly making a difference in someone else’s life.
Dr. Viscott says:
- If you cannot risk, you cannot grow.
- If you cannot grow, you cannot become your best.
- If you cannot become your best, you cannot be happy.
- And if you cannot be happy, what else matters?
He marries the link between RISKING and happiness itself. Our greatest growth happens when we are children risking and daring and falling down and embarrassing ourselves all day long. We then find ways of protecting ourselves: excuses, bad habits, negative attitudes often not even knowing we are doing it until we are on our death beds looking back. Kicking ourselves. I’m not willing to let that happen to me. What about you?
Please share your thoughts with me.
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Posted by Amy Hale on March 29, 2010 at 6:00 am
Orr’s Law (by Dr. Leonard Orr) builds upon the theory that within every one of us, there are two people -one is a thinker; the other a prover.
The thinker, who roughly corresponds to your conscious mind, is that part of you that thinks up ideas and generates possibilities.
The prover, who roughly corresponds with your subconscious mind, has the job of collecting just the right facts to support whatever it is that the thinker thinks.
“Orr’s Law” is as follows: Whatever the thinker thinks, the prover proves.
This Week’s Experiment:
1. Choose two completely opposite statements about something (e.g. life, people, situations)
Examples:
Life is hard/Life is easy
People are naturally bad/People are naturally good
2. Write at least one paragraph to “prove” each statement.
Share and let us know what you learned.
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Posted by Amy Hale on March 19, 2010 at 2:01 pm
If you’re on the right path, you’ll get to where you want to go. Consistent commitment keeps you on the path.
The hardest thing for people to unlearn is the short attention span that’s been shaped by television, entertainment, letting the kids rule the roost, and by letting pernicious, untrue self-victimizing thoughts snuggle up into our belief systems. And this inability to be flowingly calm and ‘real’ is really just the inability to return the mind to the most important thing it can be thinking about in the present moment. It leads to a lot of much unfinished business. The unfinished business then leads to drama. The drama leads to self-dramatization including wild stories about how other people make us unhappy or destroy our dreams. This self-dramatization replaces the committed life.
As Steven Pressfield writes in, “The War of Art,” “Sometimes entire families participate unconsciously in a culture of self-dramatization. The kids fuel the tanks, the grown-ups arm the phasers, the whole starship lurches from one spine-tingling episode to another. And the crew knows how to keep it going. If the level of drama drops below a certain threshold, someone jumps in to amp it up. Dad gets drunk, Mom gets sick, Jenny shows up for church with a tattoo. It’s more fun than a movie. And it works: nobody gets a darn thing done.”
Please share your thoughts & converse with me.
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Posted by Amy Hale on February 11, 2010 at 5:48 pm
I talk out loud when I drive. I don’t worry about what I look like or who might notice. I don’t care if they think I’m on the phone or not. When I talk in the car, I talk to my inner team or to a customer who I want to make sure gets what I am wanting to convey. I might even sing a tune.
I learned to do this when I recognized how much I beat myself up while driving. Have you ever looked around and noticed that most people who are driving, if they’re not on their cell phones, their faces appear worried or angry. Or maybe their listening to all of the bad things in the new on the radio.
How do you want to feel when you’re driving to your destination? Do you want to bully yourself, hear more about a crummy economy or would you rather engage in a conversation with your team to make it the best day you’ve ever had?
Personally, I find that using my driving time to build myself up instead of using ways that break down my mindset is far more useful to me. When you hold worries and anger inside your head, it brings on headaches, ulcers and more worry and anger. Your whole nervous system goes wild.
Plus, if you’re not use to hearing your own voice or you want to practice moving toward fearless public speaking, the car is the perfect place to speak out.
Just think, your competitors don’t do this. They’re listening to their negative self-talk, terrible news or swearing at traffic. So speak to your inner team and step out from the crowd and make success happen – one drive at a time.
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Posted by Amy Hale on January 31, 2010 at 11:27 am
Adapted from Wayne Dyer
- Have a mind that is open to everything
- Practice non-attachment.
- You cannot give what you don’t have. (e.g. love) If you are in the habit of saying “gimme”, the universe will say the same thing. If you are in the habit of saying “what can I do for you”, the universe will say the same thing.
- There are no justifiable resentments.
- Don’t Die with your music still in you. All of you have a heroic mission. There is a purpose to everyone.
- Embrace silence. (Here you will connect with God.)
- Give up your personal history.
- You can’t solve a problem with the same mind that created it. (Literally rewrite your agreement with your reality. Admit you were wrong and you’re not going to make those choices anymore. It didn’t work. Now I realize that it didn’t work, I will change my mind.)
- Treat yourself as if you already were what you would like to become.
- Wisdom is avoiding all thoughts which weaken you.
9GCC5FKENWW2
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